Tuesday, 13 June 2017

The Window To Infinity

Inability to move forth the barrier
Anxiety in staying chained hither
Musings take hold of my existence
And I attempt to look beyond myself

Unsure whether I am an individual or a species
Baffled at the thoughts that I venture into
Wondering if I contain contradictions
As my breath in these multitudes.

The silence of another night speaks
And I see a universe beyond my window
Perhaps dividing illusions and reality
My courage battles with my darkness

As the Lady of Shalott confronts a curse
The curse that created and destroyed humanity
The galaxies in my mind collide
With all their stars floating around.

I wonder if the beauty I witness hither
Is a paraphernalia of conquests or cobwebs
I stand at crossroads unable to decide
Which road would commence my journey

It isn't a dilemma of choices
Rather a conflict of peaceful nothingness.
And I ponder upon the possible worlds
Arising out of the multiple universes

Driven by a minute they turn at the edge
The turn that results in fatality or paradise
My sword rests rusted for I haven't fought a battle
Long since I let this nothingness engulf me.

So much that my heart is immersed into it
But it still doesn't seem dark or rotten
Perhaps being stagnant isn't always poisonous
I glance beyond this transparent wall between worlds

And I remember all that could be done
Trying to trigger a wave of action
That would finally make me take that one step
Stories that now seem to be tales from Aesop's fables.

Is it a plague or mere laziness of an empty mind
But is the mind really empty or just plaqued by dirt.
Something stirs the silence beneath my window
I watch an old shadow beside the creek

It seems dark yet quite familiar
Beneath my skin blood crawls being aware.
The hooded shadow claims to be death
My senses shudder a bit giving way to anxiety

I wonder if it is too early for me to encounter death
But it laughs at me in cacophony
"Haven't you been close to me so often
All when you celebrated the rush of your senses

When you were a kid who couldn't stop taking risks
Climbing difficult terrains, challenging your sphere
Outside the box that was meant for you
Were you afraid of me then?

No. You sought pleasure in defying me
You lived everyday to disown me
And here after so many years you shiver
At the thought of not having lived

Before you are ready to defy my presence
I enjoy your helplessness but not much
I seem powerless without a contender
As strong as the mountains once explored

As vibrant as the waves once surfed upon
My opponent is now consumed by life
Yet the signs of life are dismal enough
Don't you see I am death and you are life

But we are quite similar to each other
The grass that you walked upon in peace
Never succumbs to fear when it dies and regrows
Nor does the ocean which you looked at in awe

And the horizon atop the peak you ascended
Gives in to die and be born again everyday
Only so you could admire the ecstasy
Of the laws that create and sustain you

You knew all of this when you were a kid
Do humans grow up to be nascent
Or do they forget how fragility is strength
Banging their doors to get acknowledged,

Consumed and get drained of what makes them
For they seem to be foolish enough
To take pride in who they have become
Believing the mirage of their superiority over the universe

Ah! How they build giant abodes
And learn to control technology
Seek pleasure to use it for destruction
Hence exhaust themselves for illusions

Before reality knocks at their boxes 
To take them into nothingness
That constitutes them inside out now
Amusing it is to see how they forget it all.

The universe pours them wine
Portraying illusions of power
And they get lured to believe
Nobody greater than them ever existed

I see you too are getting filled
Up to the brim by this vicious trap"
Death mocks at my shallowness
Leaving me dumbstruck and bewildered

Perhaps this was what the sound of waves say
Or when the wind gushes around wavering through my hair
When I feel small facing the vast ocean
That never takes pride for bringing tornadoes

I had realized this when I struggled to reach
Atop the mountain I admired
Or when I fought my first battle 
Against a ruthless clan on the battlefield

Death had stayed with me
But agreed to bid time for me
Till I had seen all that the world gave me
And here I had ceased to remember

That I exist as the smallest atom
To create a universe with the magic I possess
To exist with continuity until one day
When I need to defy my existence

To justify the existence of eternity of ideas
For I will perish one day
But my musings would remain
Echoing through the wind 

Surpassing lands with enormous waves
Merging into Aurora from the peaks
Perhaps reaching minds that wonder
At a window like this that divides

The worlds of illusions and realities
If the contradictions that make them
Constitute unexplored dimensions
That would make them take that step

To realize that death is not fatal
It is the celebration of a journey
Into a world beyond the unexplored horizon
And all this time when they would have survived

Traversed the journey of life
Death awaited them like a true companion
Through eternity, bringing the peace they sought
Reminding them to live before they die

Perhaps Napoleon would have thought this too
Or Ashoka would have embraced truth once he knew
I wonder if these thoughts are the echoes
Of minds that had once existed here forth

Reaching out to my insomniac mind
When the frequencies collide with my insanity
Hither I stand by the ephemeral window
The wall that merges eternity with pauses

And my sword awaits me to brush off the rust
And plunge my existence into the unknown
Battling towards the end of this journey
For another one accompanies me till the end

To venture into the after life one day 
Death awaits me after I have lived enough
There is a celebration in another galaxy
But I will join it once I have celebrated this carousal

I can look back to this world of illusions
Or step ahead from here like humanity
I exist at both sides of the window
And I wonder where I am at twilight

I stand and my sword clings on the edge
I start, I end, I continue till infinity
I am an individual, I am my species,
I die, I am born, I live to die, I die to live..


                                                     

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